


I’m not what you think I am

by Moonless_Sky



Category: Captain Marvel (2019), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, F/F, F/M, Female Bucky Barnes, Female Steve Rogers, Humor, Slow Burn, Substance Abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-04
Updated: 2019-12-18
Packaged: 2020-02-18 14:28:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18701464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moonless_Sky/pseuds/Moonless_Sky
Summary: Thor just wants his friends to be happy.Valkyrie just wants beer and a girlfriend.Carol Danvers doesn't want to think about that cute girl she keeps seeing all around school who makes her feel things.Nothing ever goes to plan.





	1. Higher, further, faster

**Author's Note:**

> So, this was written in a fit of post-endgame depression, and i'm still a little unsure about it.  
> I know Valkyrie and Captain Marvel isn't the most written about ship, but this will be 100% ValCarol-centered. With some other ships too because why not.
> 
> Just some relevant info before reading:  
> -This is set kind of modern but i don't really have a specific year in mind, maybe like 2014 idk.  
> -Steve and Bucky are biological females. I have nothing against the pairing of them as males, but something about fem!steve and fem!bucky adds a different layer to their relationship. If that turns you off of this than i apologize.  
> -Also some of these characters might not be written that well because this is my first time writing anything MCU-related  
> -They're all in high school if you couldn't tell
> 
> I know this probably isn't the best written thing, but give it a chance.
> 
> Also, this is pretty much my unedited first draft of this chapter fueled by sleep deprivation that i decided to post because i didn't want to procrastinate any longer so yeah.

Valkyrie like very few things.

She likes her best friend Thor, the son of the mayor of their small town. She likes Thor’s little brother, Loki (when Loki isn’t being a mischievous little shit). She likes the rest of her medium-sized circle of friends. She even likes her parents, despite the fact that they gave her the weirdest name even ( _Brunnhilde?_ Who the fuck came up with that? They’re supposed to be Australian).

Valkyrie also, like any teenage delinquent, enjoys copious amounts of alcohol. Being best friends with the mayor’s son helps that along a little bit; rich parents, fully stocked liquor cabinets. High tolerance is fun. Thor might be able to drink most of their friends under the table, but Valkyrie can drink _him_ under the table, so take _that_ Odinson.

Valkyrie also likes pretty girls. Very much. Thor (bless him) tries his best but all of the girls he tries to set her up with are cute, but all they care about is sex. Some wingman Thor is.

Of course, Valkyrie has indulged herself on a few occasions, because she’s a hormonal teenager. But nothing beyond that.

It’s just as well; Valkyrie only really has eyes for one person. A certain blond-haired, brown-eyed, walking grunge advertisement that she likes to give what Thor likes to call “heart-eyes” during her AP Calc and Physics classes.

Yeah, Carol Danvers. Fuck you.

It should go without saying that Valkyrie has a huge, _massive_ crush on Carol Danvers. She’s smart, she’s cute, what’s not to like.

It’s really too bad that she’s probably straight. At least, that’s what Valkyrie’s numerous _cough_ not actually that numerous _cough_ interactions and anxiety are telling her.

This is the predicament Valkyrie finds herself in as she drops her bag and slumps down across from Thor at their lunch table.

Thor smiles and greets her in the jovial way that only he can.

Loudly, in case Valkyrie didn’t remember.

“Valkyrie!” he yells. “How’s your day been?”

“It was pretty good, until I sat down here.”

Loki snorts from his seat next to Thor. He’s got his face buried in a textbook and is furiously scribbling down things in a notebook, and Valkyrie decides to poke fun at him too.

“Whatcha readin’ little Thor?”

Loki’s pencil flies out of his hand, and he raises his head to glare at Valkyrie, and he’s got his exasperated-slash-so-done-with-your-shit-slash-offended face on and Valkyrie knows she’s won. Now she just has to try her best not to laugh.

He pinches the bridge of his nose, and Valkyrie almost looses it, only narrowly avoiding that by stuffing her sandwich into her mouth.

“If you ever call me that again,” his expression is scarily serious now, “I’ll kill you.”

He glares at Valkyrie for a second longer before he turns his attention back to the textbook. Valkyrie keeps it together for another second before she starts laughing. Thor joins in immediately and even Loki is laughing after a minute.

In the many years she’s known him, Thor has always exuded a pleasant, carefree atmosphere. Today is no different, and Valkyrie’s slightly sour mood is all but forgotten.

“So where are the nerds?” Valkyrie asks Thor as her laughter peters off.

“Stark and Banner are…in the lab.” Thor grimaces. “They’ve been there for a while.”

Tony Stark and Bruce Banner, the resident geniuses of their group, are no strangers to long stays in the many different labs their school has to offer. But the way Thor is talking is making Valkyrie nervous.

“How long is a ‘while’?”

Thor opens his mouth but Loki speaks before he can. “Since yesterday.”

Thor’s offended expression is almost audible, and Loki looks at him incredulously and shrugs. “What, brother? We both know you were going to sugarcoat it because you don’t want to make her” he gestures to Valkyrie, “worry.”

Valkyrie turns to Thor and he shrugs apologetically. “I _didn’t_ want to worry you, Val.” He grins, “I mean really, this isn’t the first time this has happened.”

“Have you tried to get them out?”

Loki speaks without looking away from his book before Thor can reply. “My dear brother is neglecting to mention that he’s scared of going in the lab while Banner and Stark are working.”

“I’m sorry, little brother. Forgive me if I don’t want to get my eyebrows burnt off _again_. I think I looked weird enough the last time around.”

Loki snickers, and so does Valkyrie, but she manages to hide it behind her hands. They all remember well about a year ago when Thor had come running out of the lab; eyebrows gone, face covered in soot, and the tips of his log hair singed. No one could look at him with a straight face for months afterwards.

Valkyrie snickers again, not trying to hide it this time. “Good point. I guess they’ll come out eventually. What about the other nerds?”

“Rogers isn’t really much of a nerd, but she’s out on the track; running.”

“In _November_?”

Thor just stares at her and she snorts. “Yeah, Rogers is insane. That checks out. Where’s Barnes?”

“Where do you think?” Loki pipes up, finally giving up on his book and sliding it into his bag. “With Rogers. She and Steph are attached at the hip.”

“Have they finally declared their undying love for each other?”

“No” Thor grumbles, “But I’m about ready to just lock them in a room together and be done with it.”

Valkyrie sighs. “I feel like a joke about coming out of the closet would be good here, but I can’t think of anything.”

Thor snorts. “You disappoint me. You’re supposed to be our source for gay jokes.”

“Yeah, I know, I’m slipping.”

“But Rogers and Barnes, they’re old news.” Thor leans back and rubs his stubble-covered chin thoughtfully. Stubble-covered is a bit of a misnomer too; it’s still a little patchy. He needs to shave.

“Yes,” Thor continues, “Old news. But what about you, my often-angry friend? Do you have your eye on anyone?”

Yes, Valkyrie most definitely has her eye one someone, but there’s no way she’s going to tell Thor that. Or who.

“I only ask…I’d hate to see you come to another one of my parties alone and spend the entire time drinking.”

“I drink no matter what.” Valkyrie laughs. “Your dad has some very, _very_ nice taste in liquor.”

“The party is in three weeks. _Please_ tell me you’re bringing someone.”

Valkyrie looks over to the other end of the cafeteria at the exact wrong moment, right as “someone” is standing up to leave.

Carol Danvers’ whole grunge aesthetic is in full swing today. A Nine Inch Nails shirt under a bomber jacket, dark blue jeans, and a shirt tied around her waist. A grey hat with some sort of weird eagle logo is perched on top of her wavy blonde hair, completing the whole look.

She catches Valkyrie’s eyes, staring back at her for a few seconds. Then she smiles, winks, and walks through the door.

Valkyrie can feel blood rush to her face and it cements a fact in her mind; Carol Danvers might be straight, but Valkyrie sure isn’t.

Thor and Loki follow her line of sight, just in time to see Carol leave. They‘re looking at her owlishly when she turns back around, and after a moment of silence she snaps at them, “What?”

Thor just laughs, so Valkyrie kicks his shin under the table. It just makes him laugh harder.

And now Loki is laughing too. They’re both giving her knowing looks and it’s all just pissing her off. For two brothers who don’t look like each other, they are disturbingly similar.

The bell decides it’s time to ring, thank fucking god, and Valkyrie stands up so forcefully she almost trips and eats shit. But she manages to get one of her backpack straps around her shoulder before she runs away from the brothers.

She can still hear them laughing as she walks away, the bastards.

\---

It’s lab day in Physics, and their teacher is feeling especially evil today, stamping out the momentary joy of being able to choose your own partners as quickly as he can.

He’ll be picking partners, he announces.

Fuck.

Valkyrie doesn’t have the energy to socialize with not one of her friends.

Fuuuuuck.

At least Rogers is in the class with her. As unlikely as them being paired together is.

Valkyrie manages to catch Rogers’ eyes, and she tries to convey with complex eye movements and eyebrow wiggles that she hopes they get grouped together.

Of course, Steph doesn’t understand. She just looks confused.

And then Valkyrie hears her name. Along with the name Carol Danvers.

Dammit.


	2. I laugh, on the inside

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> stuff gets slightly more gay  
> two important characters are introduced

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took me a little longer than i expected, but it's still here. Thank you to everyone who commented or left kudos after i posted the first chapter. some of them really made my day. Here's chapter two, i hope you enjoy!

Valkyrie usually tries to maintain some sort of outer peace no matter what’s going on inside. But this current situation is making that pretty hard.

And now the teacher is droning on about how this is going to be a long project; that the class will be in these groups for the next _month_ or so.

Shit.

_Shit._

Valkyrie wants to raise her hand right now and say that this group won’t work. But Mr. Coulson won’t take any of her shit so that idea is firmly off the table. And it’s not like Valkyrie doesn’t want an excuse to spend time with her crush, but a month is a long time to have to interact with her probably-straight crush, and Valkyrie is just the slightest bit worried that she’ll say something she regrets.

Coulson stops talking and everybody is standing up and shuffling around to sit with their partners, and Valkyrie resigns herself to her fate.

She starts to stand up when someone drops into the empty seat next to her. Valkyrie knows who it is but she looks over just to make sure.

(It’s Carol Danvers.)

Carol is smiling at her, and it should be illegal because it’s making Valkyrie feel things that scare and confuse her.

“Are you alright?” Carol asks, frowning now, “You look kinda pale.”

“I’m…I’m fine. I just zoned out; contemplated the mysteries of the universe and all that.”

“Right.” Carol responds, definitely not believeing Valkyrie’s lies.

Honestly, Valkyrie could make a throne out of them at this point.

But Valkyrie doesn’t respond, and they move past it.

So,” Carol says, seeming slightly unsure all of a sudden, “We’ve, ah, we’ve met before but I don’t think I’ve ever introduced myself. I’m Carol. Carol Danvers.”

Valkyrie wants to say “I know.” But that would probably be creepy so instead she says: “I’m Valkyrie.” She sticks out a hand. “Nice to meet you.”

Carol takes her hand and shakes it, and Valkyrie is surprised at how firm her grip is. And for Valkyrie that is saying something because she definitely isn’t the weakest person.

Carol lets Valkyrie’s hand drop. “Valkyrie…That isn’t your real name, is it?”

Valkyrie sits back in her chair, “No. But my name is something silly that doesn’t bear repeating.”

Carol snorts. “It can’t be that bad.”

“It is.”

Come oooon.” Carol pokes her in the side. “Tell me.”

Valkyrie bats her hand away, “You’re insufferable.”

“I wouldn’t be if you would just _tell me_.”

“ _Fine!_ Fine. It’s Brunnhilde. My name is Brunnhilde.”

“That’s not half as bad as you made it sound. Was that really so hard?”

“ _Yes._ ”

Carol laughs and falls silent. So does everyone else.

Coulson is talking again about the project. It sounds pretty interesting too, free range to do anything they can explain and describe. And they’ve got a month to do it.

“Brunnhilde, eh?” Carol whispers, “Where do you get a name like that?”

“Bastard child of two Australians and an unhealthy fascination with Norse mythology. My dad loved all that stuff. He’s where I got Valkyrie from too.”

Valkyrie is surprised that she’s telling someone else the origin of her nickname; surprised she can talk about it this easily. Only Thor and their circle of friends know.

“He sounds nice.” Carol says softly.

Valkyrie mumbles an affirmative, and they fall into a not-so-awkward silence.

This is alright. This is good.

Valkyrie can do this.

“So” Carol says, “Do you...do you want to work on this after school?”

No Valkyrie cannot.

“Sure. I’d suggest we meet at my house but that’s a can of worms even I don’t want to open.”

“My place is fine.” Carol sounds nonchalant. “Give me your number; I’ll text you the address.”

Valkyrie can _definitely_ do this.

\---

It’s only later, as Valkyrie drives maybe a little too fast towards Carol’s house, that she realizes _no she can’t no she can’t no she can’t_.

She sits in her car for a solid five minutes, white knuckling the steering wheel, before she finally gets the courage to get out.

Carol’s house is pretty cool too; large, two-story, modern architecture. It’s slightly larger than Valkyrie’s own home.

There’s a small pile of cardboard boxes near the door, and Valkyrie give them a once-over as she approaches.

She’s not eavesdropping, she’s just curious.

Valkyrie has her hand up to knock when she sees the doorbell, so she drops her hand and spams the bell. She can hear it echoing through the house, along with what sounds like muffled yelling; yelling profanity if Valkyrie is right. After that there’s some mildly concerning near the door, more swearing, and what sounds like a cat.

The door opens a minute later, and Carol’s slightly disheveled head appears. Her face lights up when she sees Valkyrie. Valkyrie tries not to read into that too much.

“Hi.” Carol says, smiling. She’s out of breath too. Weird.

“Hey.” Valkyrie responds. “You good?”

Carol lets the door open fully. The leather jacket is gone, so is the hat, and Carol is barefoot. Valkyrie lets her eyes linger on Carol’s muscled arms for a little too long.

“Yeah” Carol says, a little too enthusiastically, “You just surprised me, is all.”

“I thought you were expecting me?”

“Yeah so did I.”

They’re both silent, until Valkyrie shrugs.

“So can I come in?”

Carol stands to the side and gestures, “Enter at your own risk.”

The inside of the house is surprisingly homey. It’s all warm colors, feeling pleasantly lived in.

Carol shuts the door behind them and makes her way towards one of the hallways off the foyer. The hallway has a few doors down its length, and Carol opens one and beckons Valkyrie.

Valkyrie assumes this is Carol’s bedroom. It looks like someone had hurriedly cleaned it minutes earlier, but it’s still pretty messy.

There are clothes in a pile in the corner. Carol has a nice desk too but it’s cluttered with everything from paper to some straight-up model planes. One of the windows is open, despite the fact that it’s fucking _November_.

Valkyrie learns why the window is wide open when she takes a deep breath through her nose. It smells kind of like pot.

Valkyrie doesn’t mention it. As a fledgling alcoholic she figures that would be pretty hypocritical of her.

Other than all that, it’s pretty nice. Valkyrie spies a black and silver cylinder on a chrome stand in another corner. It’s got a stand with some music next to it, and Valkyrie just now remembers that Carol is part of the marching band.

Valkyrie doesn’t know what the instrument in the corner is but she wants to play it.

“So,” Carol says, and Valkyrie looks over at her. She’s rubbing the back of her neck sheepishly and looking sort of embarrassed.

It’s kind of cute.

“It’s kind of a shitshow in here. I figure we might want to just work at the table.”

Valkyrie shrugs, trying for nonchalance but kind of coming off as a dick.

Carol grabs a silver laptop from the mess of her desk and leads Valkyrie to a large wooden table. Valkyrie hefts her bag up on to the table and is about to sit when an orange blur darts across the room and springs on to the table.

It’s a cat. It’s an adorable red and orange striped tabby cat, and Valkyrie jumps and screams like a little girl.

Smooth.

Valkyrie is just the picture of smoothness.

It’s a fucking cat, god _dammit_.

Carol cracks up and starts to laugh. Valkyrie can’t bring herself to join her because this is a serious situation that is not funny at all. The cat meows and Carol scoops it up, still laughing.

“This is Goose.” Carol says, arms curling around the cat. Valkyrie can hear it purring loudly. “She says hi.”

Valkyrie doesn’t respond with words. She just pulls a chair out and collapses into it, grumbling all the way.

Valkyrie can hear Carol speaking to the Goose, cooing to her and talking all sorts of nonsense cat talk. Valkyrie will not look on principal, even though it all sounds very cute.

Well, Valkyrie won’t look for like ten seconds, because that’s all she can resist.

Carol notices her looking. “Come on, _Valkyrie_. Laugh a little. It’s cute.”

Valkyrie stares at her and smiles exaggeratedly. “I’m laughing on the inside.”

Carol waves a hand in dismissal and sets the cat down. “Bullshit, you Grinch.”

“Did you just call me a Grinch?”

“ _Yes_.”

“Whatever.” Valkyrie throws up her hands. “Should we start on what I came here to do, maybe? Just a thought.”

“You’re no fun.” Carol pouts.

“Eh, get to know me better. I’ll be more fun then.”

There we go, that was much smoother.

“In all seriousness, though.” Valkyrie says, and Carol nods.

“I wrote down a few ideas before you got here,” Carol says, opening her laptop, “all of them are kind of silly in some way or another, so I hope you brought ideas too.”

Valkyrie nods, is about to say something to that effect when the front door creaks open.

Valkyrie looks at Carol, who smiles. “It’s just my dad, don’t worry. You’ll probably like him.”

Well… _shit_.

Valkyrie was not expecting this.

She really hopes that neither Carol nor her father notice her internal peril.

Carol’s father chooses this as the perfect time to walk in. He stops at the opposite end of the table to survey them.

He looks…kind of scary. He’s in all black, from the tips of his worn black boots to the upturned collar of his long black leather coat, to the honest-to-god eye patch over his left eye. He’s got his hands on his hips and is looking at them silently. Valkyrie feels blood rush to her face.

Eventually Carol breaks the silence.

“Valkyrie, meet Nicholas Fury, my father. Dad, meet Valkyrie. We’re gonna be partners on a project for a while.”

Nicholas Fury doesn’t speak, he just stares. Eventually the cat, Goose, comes running out of whatever dark corner she was lurking in and scales Fury in a second, perching on his shoulder.

Valkyrie can’t help herself. She laughs.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright so i'm making Carol a not-straight stoner band nerd because i can write that because that's what i am.  
> if it wasn't implied Goose and Fury are the two important characters i was talking about.  
> also Fury is Carol's adopted father for reasons that will be gone into later.  
> Thanks for reading!


	3. Give me a hug

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor is the hero we deserve

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the title is still a quote from captain marvel, it was that or "that's not a cat"  
> sorry this chapter took so long to get out. i was dealing with some things/very busy. on the upside i am officially out of high school now, so hooray!

That went well, Valkyrie thinks, as she sips her beer.

It’s night now, or technically the morning, or whatever the fuck.

It didn’t actually go well either.

But as shitty as the beer she’s drinking is, it does an excellent job of helping her block out the fact that she completely embarrassed herself in front of her crush _and_ her crush’s father.

Okay, maybe the beer isn’t doing as well as she thinks.

“Wow.” Thor says, and Valkyrie looks back at him. He’s leaning back, bracing himself on his hands. His beer is forgotten next to him and he looks like he just tasted something disgusting. “This is very terrible beer.” He picks the bottle up and squints at the label. “See if I buy it again.”

“You stole this stuff from your dad, and we both know it.”

“I stole it from the _fridge_.” Thor replies, “There’s a difference.”

“Is there though?”

Thor just huffs and takes another sip. Valkyrie does too. It’s bad but not bad enough to stop drinking.

“Why _did_ you take beer anyway? You could’ve stolen us some good alcohol.”

“I think my mother is on to me. Dad probably would be too but he’s too busy to notice. I figure I should stick to the cheap stuff for a while so they don’t notice.”

Valkyrie hears a slight tone of bitterness in Thor’s voice, and Valkyrie glances at him. He’s picking at the label on the bottle, looking very absorbed in a deep thought. Valkyrie could press about why exactly he sounds bitter but she decides not to press.

“So,” Thor says after a few minutes of silence, “Carol Danvers?”

Valkyrie chokes on a mouthful of beer, and after she stops coughing she opens her mouth to respond but she can already feel how hot her face is. Thor is looking at her with a shit-eating grin plastered over his face.

He chuckles. “She is cute, I’ll give you that.”

Valkyrie pouts. “Yeah, she is. Too bad she’s straight.”

Thor chuckles again. If he does it any more Valkyrie might hit him because it’s maddening how smug he is.

“You have, like, the worst gaydar of any gay person I’ve met. Here, I’ll demonstrate.”

He fishes his phone out of his pocket and taps and swipes with his thumb a few times before he holds it out to Valkyrie screen-first.

He’s calling Stephanie Rogers.

Shit.

Steph picks up after a few rings.

The first sounds out of the phone are some incomprehensible groans and what Valkyrie thinks are muffled profanities.

Steph clears her throat on the other end of the line. “Thor, what…it’s one in morning, _what the **fuck**_?”

“Language, Captain,” Thor chides jokingly, and apparently it’s some sort of inside joke because Steph snorts sleepily and swears at Thor under her breath, “And I’m sorry, but I have a question that couldn’t wait until tomorrow.”

“What is it?” There’s some rustling from the other end of the line, some sighing too. “I’m awake now, go ahead and ask.”

Thor looks over at Valkyrie and grins before he talks, “Would you say that Carol Danvers is straight?”

“As a sine wave. We’re talking about the same Carol Danvers right? The band nerd?”

Thor grins at Valkyrie; he knows he’s won. “Thank you, Steph. See you tomorrow.”

He hangs up before they can catch any of Steph’s tired complaining.

“Usually she’s pretty good at telling that kind of stuff,” Thor shrugs, “so I trust Steph in this case.”

“Is she good at telling that though? I mean, her and Bucky still think that they’re not in love with each other.”

Thor hurries to retort. “That’s an extreme case.”

And yeah he has Valkyrie there.

“I just…I want to take some time. Get to know her first.” Valkyrie rolls a bottle between her hands. “I mean, the last real relationship I had was years ago. I should try not to fuck this up before it even happens.”

Thor smiles, “You can do whatever you want, Val. But don’t wait too long. You’ll just get yourself hurt.”

Valkyrie laughs uneasily, but Thor doesn’t seem to notice.

She wraps one arm around Thor’s shoulders and squeezes, wrapping him in an awkward side hug.

“Thank you.” Valkyrie says after a few seconds.

“I’m your best friend, Val.” He wraps an arm around her and pulls her closer.

They stay like that until Thor feels Valkyrie’s head fall against his shoulder, along with quiet snoring muffled by his shirt.

Thor looks down at Valkyrie with fondness before he picks her up as delicately as he can and carries her inside.

Thank god she’s shorter than him.

Also thank god that this isn’t the first time this has happened.

Thor sets Valkyrie down in his own bed and works off her boots before he drapes the blankets over her.

He steals a pillow from the other side of the bed and goes to the futon in the corner of the room. He’s slept on it enough that it has stopped being uncomfortable.

Before he can get comfortable and even try to close his eyes, his phone buzzes in his pocket. He fishes it out and after a brief moment of screen-induced blindness, he opens his phone to look at the notification.

It’s a text.

From an unknown number.

Thor, buzzed and tired, can’t really find the energy to care about this.

Curiosity gets the better of him in the end.

\---

_Unknown_

 

**Messenger**

(Thor Odinson)

**_2:01am_ **

Hey is this Thor

**_2:01am_ **

yea who this?

**_2:03am_ **

My name is Carol

I need your help

**_2:04am_ **

with what

**_2:07am_ **

I want to ask your friend Valkyrie out

**_2:12am_ **

hello?

**_2:12am_ **

sry had to take a minute to laugh

**_2:13am_ **

what’s so funny

**_2:14am_ **

nothing dont worry ill tell you later

**_2:15am_ **

i gotchu tho ill help

text me in the morning

**_2:16am_ **

It is the morning

**_2:17am_ **

the later morning then

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was my first attempt at writing an dialogue over phone, it was inspired by one of my favorite AvaLance fics (a few of my plot points are from it too), and i think it turned out pretty good.  
> thanks for reading!


	4. Since when is a shortcut cheating?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oops

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm not quite sure about this chapter, but i figure i procrastinated long enough, so here you go  
> i tried to get it out earlier, but i was dealing with some things that fucked that goal to shit  
> on the plus side i'm officially a high school graduate so yay  
> i listened to the album dinosaurchestra by lemon demon while i wrote this so listen to that if your in to that  
> i'm also posting this late at night so wooo

_Carol Danvers_

 

**Messenger**

(Thor Odinson)

**_6:26am_ **

Is it the later morning yet

Thor

**_6:27am_ **

Thor

**_6:29am_ **

Thooooooor

**_6:32am_ **

it has been 4hrs what is

wrong with u

**_6:32am_ **

Is it the later morning yet

**_6:33am_ **

 no its only been 4 fucking

hours why the hell are u

even up

 

**_6:35am_ **

It’s almost 640 why wouldn’t I be up

**_6:37am_ **

bc its almost 640 everything is

bright and loud why would u

do this to me

**_6:39am_ **

You’re doing an awful lot of complaining

**_6:40am_ **

What, are you hungover

**_6:40am_ **

Oh my god you’re hungover

**_6:40am_ **

I’m so sorry

**_6:41am_ **

i will neither confirm nor deny these accusataions

*accustions

shit

accusations

yeah

**_6:42am_ **

That’s a yes then

Well I’m sorry I would’ve waited if I knew

**_6:43am_ **

how are u this chipper this early

teach me ur secrets

**_6:45am_ **

High gay and sleep deprived

It’s an age old formula

**_6:47am_ **

that pretty much rules it out for me then

**_6:49am_ **

So is it the later morning yet

**_6:50am_ **

ye

meet me during lunch well talk

now excuse me i need like a gallon of coffe

**_6:50am_ **

Doesn’t Valkyrie usually sit with you during lunch

**_6:51am_ **

yeah but her hangover is going to be worse

she drank more than me

like a lot

so probs gonna drop her off at her house

**_6:52am_ **

Will she be alright

**_6:52am_ **

yeah she’s got experience

she just needs to sleep it off

**_6:55am_ **

Okay then

See you at lunch

\---

Thor puts down his phone and wonders if he can get any of his and Valkyrie’s friends to help with Operation: Get Valkyrie a Date.

Probably.

But first, coffee.

Before he leaves, Thor glances over at Valkyrie. She’s still out cold. And she’s managed to kick off most of the blankets.

And she’s splayed herself out over most of the bed.

Thor laughs as quietly as he can at how ridiculous she is asleep before he walks out. His house _cough_ mansion _cough_ is completely empty; mom is already at work and dad probably never came home the previous night. As depressing as that sort of is, it’s nice and peaceful. The sun has barely crested over the horizon, and it’s all filtered through an overcast sky.

It’s nice. Thor can just lean against the kitchen island and stare while the coffee brews. Plus the sun is just dim enough that he can look without wanting to die every time he opens his eyes.

A minute later Thor has two mugs of black-as-tar coffee.

Valkyrie isn’t in his bed anymore either. A quick inspection leads to the bathroom down the hall from Thor’s bedroom.

Valkyrie is emptying the contents of her stomach violently into the toilet. Thor, being a veteran of many hangovers, can’t really do anything to help so he just sets the mugs of coffee down and puts a comforting hand on Valkyrie’s back.

She stops throwing up a few minutes later, thank god. Thor was starting to get concerned.

She’s still leaning over the toilet, and Thor gets concerned again until she groans and speaks.

“My mouth tastes like ass.”

Maybe more like a mumble.

Thor smiles. “You know, I didn’t take you for this much of a lightweight.”

Valkyrie spits and lifts her head up and _wow_ she isn’t looking too good. So instead of commenting on how much color her face doesn’t have, Thor just holds out one of the coffee mugs.

She snatches it out of Thor’s hands and takes a few long swallows, and Thor thought it was still burning hot but Valkyrie doesn’t really do half-measures. They sit in a friendly silence for a while, until Valkyrie groans.

“Can you take me home?”

Thor laughs. “’Course, Val. What are friends for, if not to drive other friends home when they’re too hungover to function?”

Valkyrie laughs, but it turns into a groan. Thor drains the last of his coffee and crouches down to help her up, slipping her arm over his shoulders. She sways for a minute but manages to find her footing.

Neither of them talks on the way to Thor’s car. Valkyrie slumps into the passenger seat and promptly falls asleep.

It’s a little brighter outside now and Thor can’t find his goddamn sunglasses and it’s _too_ bright.

Thor drops Valkyrie off without any fanfare; her mom’s car is already gone thank _fuck_.

That’s one awkward conversation that Thor doesn’t want to witness or participate in.

Thor makes a quick stop back at his house for his backpack and more coffee. Loki has already left at this point, so Thor cleans up the bathroom and brushes his teeth (less brushes his teeth and more gargles a mouthful of mouthwash).

Add in some clean clothes and Thor is ready for the day.

\---

Thor was not ready for the day.

It’s lunch now so on one hand, at least he has a brief reprieve from class, but on the other his food tastes like ass, Loki is actually doing his homework for once, Steph and Bucky are sitting _literally_ as close as two people can on the other side of the circular table (they’re probably fucking holding hands under the goddamn table), Valkyrie isn’t there, and Tony and Bruce are talking _way_ too loud.

Thor has finally had it. “Gentlemen!” He winces at how loud his own voice is. “Friends. Could you, and this is just a thought, could you talk quieter, please.”

Thor can already fucking hear the sarcastic reply that Tony is going to blurt out, but he can probably see all of Thor’s subtle hangover tells and being well-acquainted with alcohol himself, decides to not be snarky for once.

“You got it, point-break.”

Tony and Bruce start talking again, quieter this time, thank god. Thor eats some more of his shitty cafeteria food before he decides that it’s time to introduce his friends to Operation: Get Valkyrie a Date.

He should hurry up too, before Carol comes to sit with them.

\---

It’s easy enough to explain and they all seem pretty agreeable, so when Thor spots Carol at the other end of the cafeteria he jumps up and waves his arms and pretty much does everything besides yelling to get her attention. She freezes, looking like a deer in headlights, and Thor is afraid she’s going to bolt. She unfreezes after a minute and makes her way over to them.

Carol sits across from Thor and clears her throat awkwardly. “Can I…should I expect that every time I sit with you?”

“Yes.” Tony and the rest of the table reply at the same time. Thor would be insulted if not for the fact that it’s true.

“So,” Carol puts her hands flat on the table in front of her, “Have you filled them in yet?”

Thor nods. He also notices that, as she retracts her hands, Carol is fidgeting with the cuffs of her flannel shirt; she’s nervous.

“So Carol,” Tony says, resting his chin on his fist and letting a shit-eating grin stretch across his face, “Thor tells us you want to ask our good friend Valkyrie out on a date.”

Steph reaches out and hits the back of Tony’s head.

“What?”

“Have some tact, man.”

But Carol thinks it’s funny. She snorts and laughs.

“I do want to ask her out.”

Thor decided it was his time to shine. “I have a plan to help with that. I’m throwing a party in about two weeks. I think you should ask her to go to it with you.”

“I don’t want to jump into anything too fast.” Carol shrugs. “I don’t want a one night stand; I actually want to get to know her. I’ve only really had one meaningful relationship.” She rubs the back of her neck sheepishly. “I don’t even know if she likes me. I don’t want to fuck this up before I even have a chance to fuck it up.”

Thor holds up his hands. “I get it, don’t worry.” He ponders for a moment. “Get to know her then. You two are working on a project together, right? Then use that.”

Carol nods. “You know, you give pretty decent advice when you want to.”

“I can be sage when I want to.”

The table erupts in quiet giggles and laughter, so Thor just scoffs at them all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thor isn't outright telling carol that valkyrie likes her because that would be a huge breach of trust in their friendship because val told him that in confidence  
> you could argue that thor and his friends helping set the two of them up is also a breach of trust but heres the thing no  
> i tried to do the text message thing again and it was pretty fun to write so i hope it's fun to read  
> also i gave some of the other avengers lines, and i want to try to writing more dialogue for them in the future  
> hope you enjoyed


	5. He's no Brad Pitt, Sir

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone gets drunk, no one is safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoops

Its three days before Thor’s party and Valkyrie is freaking the fuck out.

Usually the lead-up to the party is fun for Valkyrie. She gets to help set up, which usually means she just sits back and makes sure that Thor and Co. don’t hurt themselves.

Of course this time, it’s different.

Thor sends Valkyrie to get the kegs.

Valkyrie has no idea how he gets actual kegs, but she isn’t complaining about what’ll eventually be free beer.

Kegs also mean that she needs to enlist the help of a friend with a truck, and only one person fits that description: Stephanie Rogers.

And you can’t have Steph without Bucky, so Valkyrie’s one-person job is now a three-person job.

Steph agrees, less reluctant that Valkyrie expected, which is weird ‘cause Steph doesn’t really drink that much, but Valkyrie isn’t complaining.

When all is said and done, Valkyrie, Steph, and Bucky are all crammed into the cab of Steph’s truck.

Valkyrie shifts, trying and failing to get comfortable. “I know you got this truck at a good price, but couldn’t you have sprung for something with another row of seats?”

Steph snorts and shifts the truck into gear. “You came to me, remember? Complain all you want but let’s see you fit three kegs into Tony’s tiny-ass car, or be inconspicuous in hot rod red.”

Valkyrie scoffs and makes a rude gesture, and the cab is silent for a while.

“So Valkyrie,” Bucky pipes up from her position in between them perched on the console, “have you asked your crush to come to Thor’s party yet?”

Bucky laughs when Valkyrie chokes and glares at her. “What…is it not supposed to be obvious?” She turns to Steph, “It is obvious right?”

Steph holds a hand out and wiggles it from side to side. “It’s kind of 50/50.”

“Eh, You’re no help anyway.” Bucky scoffs, and turns to Valkyrie. “So have you asked her yet? And don’t say who because we both know who.”

Valkyrie shakes her head. “No, I just…I haven’t found the right moment.”

“For fucks sake, it’s not like you’re asking the girl to marry you. It’s a high school party.”

“Language.” Steph chastises, not taking her eyes off the road.

“Hush, you.”

\---

They have the kegs in the bed of the truck under a tarp. It’s the most obvious fucking thing in the world; the kegs bang together and slosh loudly every time Steph stops a little too fast, and in hindsight they probably should’ve brought some bungee cords or ratchet straps, but they’re almost halfway back to Thor’s house.

Everyone is just super oblivious, Valkyrie guesses.

Speaking of super oblivious people, Bucky takes this opportunity to turn conspiratorially to Valkyrie.

Turn as much as she can with them crammed into the cab of the truck like sardines.

“So I have a proposition for you.”

“Please don’t.” Valkyrie says halfheartedly.

“Here’s what we’ll do. You, me, and Carol all have AP Calc together.” She leans in, “Since we both know you won’t talk to her on your own, I’m going to…encourage you gently with force towards her so you have to talk to her.”

Valkyrie puts her hands up. “This sound like a bad plan.”

“I don’t see you coming up with anything.” Is Bucky’s indignant response.

“Why do you even care?”

Bucky starts to say something, but yelps when Steph elbows her.

Bucky shoots Steph a glare and turns back to Valkyrie.

“No reason?” She tries.

“Yeah, yeah.”

The rest of the ride passes in slightly comfortable silence. They unload the kegs and stow them under the tarp in Thor’s garage, and there’s enough shit to hide them behind that when they’re done, nothing even looks out of place. Valkyrie enters the house through the garage and finds Thor leaning over a laptop at the kitchen island.

He looks up when she nears and she can see he’s looking very serious for some reason.

“I need to tell you something, Val,” he says, “And I need you to promise me you won’t get mad.”

Valkyrie scoffs, “There’s nothing bad enough that I need to promise not to get mad.”

“Well you say that, but the last time I mentioned what I’m about to mention you kind of…” he trails off.

“Kind of what?”

“You put your fist through the wall!” Thor says emphatically.

“I don’t remember that.” Valkyrie scoffs, “I haven’t done that since—”

Valkyrie pales as realization dawns.

“No.” She turns to Thor. “No.”

He nods. “Yes.”

“No!” Valkyrie glances around the room, looking for something to break.

“Stop looking for things to break!” Thor points a finger. “This is why I wanted you to promise!”

Valkyrie deflates, striding over to one of the barstools set around the island and collapsing into it.

She looks up at Thor after a few seconds. “Are you sure it’s her? Are you sure it’s Astrid?”

“Val, you’re one of my best friends, and she broke your heart. Of course I’m sure.”

This draws a smile out of Valkyrie, and she chuckles a little. “Aww, you sap.”

“But all this talk of Astrid does tell us one thing.” Thor grins smugly, “You have a type.”

This makes Valkyrie snort, which turns into full on laughter that echoes through the kitchen.

After their laughter finally dies out Valkyrie is immediately brought back to the shitty reality at hand; she’s asking her crush to come on as her date to a party that her ex will also be at.

Christ, her life has turned into a shitty young adult novel.

“Well,” Valkyrie says after a while, “This kind of sucks, but at least it can’t get any worse.”

Thor shakes his head and _tsks_ at her. “Why would you even tempt fate like that?”

“Don’t worry,” Valkyrie replies, “I have a plan. Everything will work out great.”

\---

As per usual, Valkyrie has no plan.

1st period has come and gone, and now it’s time for AP Calc. As she trudges through the hall towards the classroom, Bucky Barnes appears next to her. When she glances at Bucky, she gets a series of winks, nods, and nudges that tell her nothing, so she just looks confused until Bucky talks like a normal person.

Bucky grins wolfishly. “Plan. Yes? No? Yes? Pick one but you can’t pick no.”

Valkyrie grimaces, but nods begrudgingly. “Fine.”

“Yay.” Bucky replies.

The classroom is, thankfully, mostly empty. And in a favorable turn one of the few people there is Carol Danvers.

Her outfit today is pretty low-key; a black hoodie with the sleeves pushed up to her elbows, jeans, and a pair of boots. She’s leaning against her desk, completely absorbed in a book cradled in one of her hands.

So absorbed that she doesn’t notice Valkyrie and Bucky until Bucky, true to her word, physically pushes Valkyrie towards Carol.

Carol looks up and stares for a moment. She blinks, and a smile stretches across her face.

“Hey,” Carol says, and she frowns after scanning Valkyrie’s face for a minute, “What’s wrong? You look tense…or anxious. Or both.”

Valkyrie is very anxious, but that’s beside the point.

“No—I mean yes!” Valkyrie responds a little too excited. “I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

Carol purses her lips, clearly not believing Valkyrie, but she shrugs after a minute. “Alright.”

The stand in awkward silence until Carol smiles again. “Did you have something you wanted to talk about? Or do you prefer we just stand in silence? I’m not partial to either but—”

“I did.” Valkyrie interrupts, and winces. “So…you’ve heard that Thor is having a party tomorrow right?”

“Yeah.” Carol replies, “I’ve been to a few of his other parties. They were pretty fun. They probably would have been more fun if I drank more, but whatever. Why?”

“Well, I was wondering if you would want to come with me to the party tomorrow,” Valkyrie winces, “Like…as my date.” She winces again.

Carol looks surprised for a second before she smiles widely. “Is that why you were so nervous? Of course I’ll come. As far as dates go it sounds fun.” She laughs. “Was that why you were so nervous?”

Valkyrie feels her face heat up, and Carol smiles. “Don’t worry, I think it’s cute.”

“So…can I pick you up around, like, 7?” Valkyrie tries to be suave but she still sounds nervous.

Carol nods and gives Valkyrie a bright smile that makes Valkyrie weak in the knees.

“See you then.”

\---

_Carol Danvers_

 

**Messenger**

(Thor Odinson)

**_3:34pm_ **

Yo Valkyrie ruined my plan

**_3:34pm_ **

what why

did someone ask her before u

**_3:35pm_ **

No

I was all set to ask her during physics today

But she decided to jump the gun

And fucking ask me

**_3:36pm_ **

yeah and

**_3:36pm_ **

i thought this was the plan

**_3:37pm_ **

Yeah but I wanted to a be the one to ask her

**_3:38pm_ **

so the only problem is ur pride got it

**_3:38pm_ **

That’s not true

**_3:39pm_ **

i just heard you shriek from across the parking lot

its tru and we both know it

 

Carol had a snarky reply half-typed before she heard a knock on the hood of her car. She looked from her position leant against her car. Thor looks the same as he did when she saw him that morning; a black shirt under a gray hooded coat, nondescript jeans and shoes, and his stubble is beginning to look a little less patchy

Thor whistles appreciatively. “Nice ride.”

“It is, isn’t it?” Carol smirks.

“So she asked you?”

“Yes.”

Thor shakes his head, “This is a problem why?”

Carol shakes her head. “It’s not. I’m just a little disappointed I couldn’t use my plan.”

“God, you’re prideful.” Thor laughs. “I can see why Val likes you.”

“Really? I thought she likes me ‘cause I’m hot.”

Thor lets out a short bark of laughter. “I’m sure that’s part of it.” He hefts his bag. “I’ll see you tomorrow night.”

Carol laughs and gets into her car. A moment later she’s accelerating out of the parking lot.

Thor gets into his own car, and there’s a nagging in the back of his mind that he’s forgotten something.

But nothing important comes to mind so he drives home to finish prepping for the party.

It’s not until the night of the party, already in full swing, that he realizes.

He forgot to warn Carol about Astrid.

And he knows damn well that Valkyrie forgot too.

Shit.

\---

Valkyrie wants to crawl out of her own skin.

Her leg is bouncing so furiously she’s surprised the entire car isn’t shaking.

Or it is shaking and she can’t tell because she’s fucking sitting in it.

Her hands are white knuckled on the steering wheel and she can’t remember the last time a girl made her this nervous.

Maybe that’s what makes this different.

Valkyrie is so absorbed in her mental questions that she doesn’t notice someone open the passenger side door and collapse heavily into the seat.

Carol’s voice finally snaps her out of her reverie.

“Yo, Earth to Valkyrie…you good?”

Valkyrie blinks once. Twice. She shakes her head and looks over at Carol. Smiles.

“I’m fine.”

“You sure?” Carol’s lips press into a thin line, “The, uh, the car was shaking before I got in. From your leg.” Her eyes drift to the steering wheel, “You’re still holding that pretty tight too.”

Apparently Carol can see right through all of Valkyrie’s lies.

Fuck, this _is_ different.

Valkyrie huffs out a laugh. “It’s just nerves, I guess.”

“That’s a little more believable.” Carol giggles.

The car is quiet for a minute, and Valkyrie glances over at Carol. She’s dressed the same, besides swapping the hoodie for a white and black flannel with its sleeves rolled up, and she’s added a dark grey beanie.

It’s Valkyrie who breaks the silence, surprisingly. “So this party is probably gonna run late, and I planned on beating Thor in a drinking contest, but I can be DD if you want. Or I can get Thor to let us stay over. Or—”

“Let’s see how the night plays out. Worst-case, we both get drunk and I take a Lyft home.” Carol laughs, “Both of us should just try to have fun.”

Valkyrie smiles sheepishly and shifts the car into gear, “Good point.”

As Valkyrie pulls away from the curb, there’s a nagging sensation in the back of her mind that she’s forgotten something important.

It probably wasn’t that important, if she’s forgotten it this easily.

Whatever, she’ll probably remember it at the most inopportune time.

\---

Carol and Valkyrie arrive after the party starts, so there’s already a healthy amount of drunken teenagers milling around.

Or unhealthy amount, as it were.

Valkyrie doesn’t really care, she just wants alcohol.

Music is blaring from an impromptu DJ station. It’s in Thor’s absurdly large living room but it’s so loud that Valkyrie can feel the bass from the front foyer.

“This is…somehow exactly what I was expecting, after meeting Thor.” Carol has to pretty much yell to be heard over the roar of the music and crowd.

“Yeah” Valkyrie yells back, “looks like Thor did some networking.”

At Carol’s confused look Valkyrie just laughs. “There’s a lot more people than usual.”

It takes them a little while to make it to the kitchen, needing to wade through a horde of drunk teenagers to get there. Most of Thor’s dad’s liquor is scattered on top of the island next to a precariously high stack of red solo cups. Somehow Thor managed to muscle the kegs into the kitchen too, and one of them is already tapped.

Valkyrie goes to the beer first.

Grabs two solo cups, fills them up, and hands one to Carol.

Valkyrie looks at Carol and says, “Having fun yet?”

Carol just grins toothily in response, and they both tip back the cups.

\---

Carol is three sheets to the wind. She’s plastered. She’s hammered.

She’s…

She’s drunk. She’s too drunk to keep coming up with synonyms for being too drunk.

Everything is fun and floaty, and Carol feels too light and too heavy at the same time but everything is good.

Her and Valkyrie even made it out to the dance floor after a few drinks (because Carol would never dance sober) and Carol has a sneaking suspicion that Thor is in charge of the music, because not two minutes after they started dancing a nice slow song started.

Apparently this was a secret cue for all of the couples to get nice and close.

Before Carol can do anything Valkyrie has her arms wrapped around Carol’s waist and her head on Carol’s shoulder and everything is nice and fine. Carol is glad in this moment that she’s taller than Valkyrie because that makes this easier.

They sway together for an unknowable amount of time. Eventually Valkyrie pulls back and stares at Carol. They’re in their own little world, and they drift closer, and closer.

It's Carol who jolts back to reality first.

“Hey,” She says, trying not to pay attention to how much her speech is sluring, “Is’ere a bathroom somewhere?”

Disappointment flashes in Valkyrie’s eyes and she frowns, “I thought we were havin’ a moment?”

“I’m pretty sure me going to the bathroom is going to ruin the moment less than me throwing up all over you.”

Valkyrie snorts, an laughs harder than she should at that.

She gestures in a vague direction, “Is there. Meet me in the kitchen when youre done. Imma get some water.”

Carol stumbles off to find the bathroom and, true to her word, empties the contents of her stomach into the toilet.

The vomit isn’t just from alcohol, it’s from nerves, but drunk as she is, Carol is still pretty sure she didn’t just preemptively fuck this up. Which is good.

So Carol stalks into the kitchen, fully intent on kissing the pretty girl after too many mouthfuls of mouthwash and water.

But said pretty girl is back up against a wall by a tall, willowy blonde girl. Carol can’t see Valkyrie’s face but she doesn’t need to.

She fucked up.

She fucked it up.

Of course she did.

She always does.

God _damn it_.

Carol leaves. She leaves the kitchen, she leaves the house, and she walks in the vague direction of somewhere she can be alone.

She also grabs a bottle of some liquor that she’s too drunk to read the label of. Normally she’d resort to weed, but she forgot to bring weed, or cigarettes.

And honestly, Carol doesn’t care anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have several things to address in this end note. 
> 
> I'm sorry that this took me so long to get out. I actually tried to get it out in September, but then the grad student who teaches my English course decided that we were writing a research paper. Which was not fun,
> 
> College is a thing, as I have found out, and it leaves me no time for anything, even sleeping.
> 
> Thank you to the several comments and kudos I got during this brief 6-ish month content drought, they motivated me to keep making progress.
> 
> Thanks to everyone who's still reading. and/or new readers. All of you make my day with your comments and kudos and bookmarks.
> 
> On to things actually related to the story. You'll notice that neither Thor nor Valkyrie told Carol about Astrid. Val didn't tell Carol because she was distracted (rightfully so), and Thor didn't tell Carol because he's everyone's favorite lovable dumbass. I did not come up with the name for Astrid, that credit goes to someone else who writes ValCap stuff who's name I cannot remember even tho I want to because they write really well. I'll stick it in this end note if I can find it.
> 
> One more thing. I got to say, trying to capture the actual feeling of being drunk in words is more difficult than I expected. Writing Carol's self-destructive and self-deprecating coping mechanisms in the end, however, was easier than it should've been, because I probably would've done the same thing in that situation.
> 
> Let's hear three cheers for unhealthy coping mechanisms!
> 
> Hope you enjoyed. I'll try to get the next chapter out faster.
> 
> Happy Holidays too, if that's ur thing.

**Author's Note:**

> the title and chapter name are both quotes from Captain Marvel, because it is full of wonderful quotes.  
> if you enjoyed, leave a comment or kudos because i crave validation in the form of numbers.


End file.
